Yet Another Poem

[Jikanu]

I wrote another poem and then put it on deviant art. If you guys have an account, any comments or ratings would be appreciated~

http://jikanu.deviantart.com/art/The...Soul-132762165

Here's the actual poem:

A Soul, shining in a dark cold night,
Ringing, silently, so shadily bright,
Contained in a vessel of a physical form,
Between infinity and its opposite, torn;

The Soul, flowing silent, through warm living veins,
Full of Love and Sorrow and Yearning Pains,
Full of Joy and Wonder, and Death and Despair,
Yearning eternally for one who's always there.

Where does it go as its container rots away?
Does it soar high to the sky, or sink down in the bay?
Does it capture itself in this physical realm?
Or does it go to a transcendent place, who's beauty overwhelms?

Does it fall asleep, never to wake?
Or sit down by its love, by an earthly lake?
Will we ever know if we're live or if we're dead?
Or will we forever daydream, thoughts racing through our heads?

[Fighterboy]

I like it better than the most recent one.

[Jikanu]

You mean the older one? o_o


THIS is the most recent one... which did you mean? o.o

anyways... any other opinions on it? improvements i should make, what quality it is as of now, etc, etc.?

[Kaiki]

I really like it. It's probably one of my favorites that I've read of yours. I don't see anything that can be improved, it's great the way it is!

[pigspark]

itss actually really cool