New Prolouge [Opinions please]

[Hazu]

Okay so I know I really suck at writing, but I'm redoing a prolouge to a story. It is mean to just leave you off- to be explain towards the end of the story, sort of. Any opinions, crit. anything is nice. Even if it makes me cry <3 I wont hates yew, lol! But really feedback is very much appreciated.






Deep within a forest of never ending night, a dark magic was being worked. The air was filled with its evil; thick with the broken laws of the forbidden magic. So heavy it caused the creatures that dwelled within the forest to shift with unease. In the courtyard of a large castle, that was as black as the heart of its King, stood five mages. Each wore maroon cloaks with a golden griffin embroidred on the back. In the middle of the circle of mages lay an infant child wrapped in a golden blanket. Another stepped forward, who wore fine maroon and black clothes could only mean the King of the Dark forest and leader of this forbidden ritual. The Shadow King un-wrapped the child, leaving him bare to the elements. The mages began to chant as he held his sword horizontally above the silent infant. Thus beginning the forbidden ritual, that had been hidden since the gods had traveled to the heavens. Slowly he slid the black blade across his hand, blood dripped form his fingers onto the child’s chest and face. He bent, setting a griffins golden feather, covered in the blood that ran from the gash in his hand, on the child’s forehead. Taking back his stance, “Arobia” he whispered holding the sword above the child. The black blade shone with the white light of his power and the child began to cry.
“Return this blood from another world, back into these lands.” In one quick, liquid like motion he turned the sword stabbing into the child’s chest and beating heart. The infant gave one final hard jerk before lying still, forever, in a pool of blood.
All was silent as they waited.
Suddenly the five mages let out a terrible screech of shock as their flesh began to rot and turn to dust. Only the king stood, watching, emotionless as they suffered such a terrifying death. He had not mentioned the price that had to be paid for the ritual, besides a life of an infant child of noble blood. He had only mentioned the reward they would be paid. Though he had only expected it to have taken three of the mages lives, maybe even four, but not all five. He gasped in alarm as he felt sharp pains surge through his body and all of his energy and strength being sapped out of him. He fell to his knees as the wind began to blow as if a terrible storm had descended upon the land, blowing the mages ashes to the edges of the world. “Damn it.” He spat, “I’ll kill whoever caused this.”